Noone loves discomfort. But what if allowing discomfort was the secret we need to create change in our lives? Babies allow discomfort for a while to get what they want. I was babysitting my 2-year-old nephew the other day, and he did something quite fascinating. He loves watching those baby cartoons on YouTube, and every time he hears a familiar sound, his eyes light up. Most of the time it’s white noise to me, and I try to change it.
Initially, when this first started he would cry, and I’d still put on something else, but he learned a new habit. Now he ALWAYS shifts my hand from the phone screen, whenever I am about to change it.
It’s more than just motor skills here, and more so about him already knowing what he wants to indulge in, and how I, “the roadblock” can prevent his balance with just a click. And he repeats it every time because I deliberately tested it.
I change it, he gets discomforted by that, he fakes a little whine to trigger my behavior somewhat, I put it back, keep my hand hovering and he gently removes it with his little hands, and he’s happy. Isn’t that fascinating?
So I was thinking of repetitive patterns, thoughts, and behaviors that we as adults partake in, how we purposely ease the discomfort of our suffering during our transformation or change; and how that ultimately keeps us in a cycle of stagnation for longer than we would like to be.
What is it that you’re missing in your life right now, & how are you keeping it out? I learned as a sociology student many years ago that babies’ brains are like sponges. They absorb everything during the development stage and mimic it.
But as we get older, some of these behaviors, attitudes, thoughts, and beliefs may no longer support our lives. That can trigger conflict, pain, and discomfort that we usually ignore by doing a few things.
We purposely try to contradict the reasoning behind the discomfort by either trivializing, modifying, denying, or adding reasons to why it’s not so bad. Hence creating some form of temporary fake balance and harmony or inconsistency or more discordance as time progresses. It’s somewhat of an identity crisis.
But what if we allowed the discomfort & what if we disrupted some of these elements in support of our long-term growth? One way to create lasting change is by allowing the change to happen even during discomfort, and by altering existing patterns and beliefs. And in practicing these new behaviors, attitudes, and beliefs a new version of our realities is created.
This is what I would love to invite you to be open to as you embrace your self and life transformation journey. The discomfort of change.
In Action Example.
Say for example you’re finding a new job or interested in it. You are very well aware that your current career path may not be supporting the life you want to create & live out.
So you decide, I am going to find a new job or start a new career journey. Instantly, discomforting beliefs come in. What if it’s too hard? What if I fail? What if I am giving up something good enough? What if I have to start all over again?
These internal phrases then cause you to trigger comforting beliefs to create a sense of fake balance once again. Such as this job isn’t so bad. I like it here. And your behaviors follow suit. Until a year passes by, and the cycle repeats itself.
Reasoning & Next Step
You see, the reason why you may not be where you want to be could be because you haven’t allowed yourself to allow the discomfort, make the decisions, and put in the effort to get there. And that takes time.
And at every stage of your journey & at the start of every new chapter, you will feel discomfort. But there is a silver lining, it becomes less, and less weight to carry, and the blueprint you’ve designed in your mind unravels marvelously.
So I have an assignment for you because I love giving homework. Where can you allow discomfort in your journey? As the week passes, notice where you’re intentionally forcing compliance. If you can identify that, then you can begin to alter your reality. Share with us your takeaway below.